I do have that trouble with smalltalk-- but I learned to appreciate it more, after traveling in countries where I sucked at the local language. In that context, I learned to LOVE these little ritualized conversations, because it's always the *same* conversation and even in a foreign language, I can *learn* that conversation: How are you? I'm fine. My name is Ethyl, what's your name? Yes, I'm from America/married/age/job/etc. I'm sorry, please excuse me. This is delicious! I have since learned to do it semi-competently even in English ;) I think the actual function is so that people can get a feel for what sort of person you are, and make a decision about whether or not they want to get to know you better. And that's OK.
Dancing, though... I suffer the classic autistic terminal clumsiness. I've tried. It just ain't happening. My poor mother sent me to three years of ballet classes hoping I'd develop a little coordination and stop running into doorframes. No luck. I appreciate social dance in theory, and I think there should be a lot more of it-- I'd be totally thrilled to see a revival of barn dances, and things like the Virginia Reel, because I have an inkling of the social-cohesion importance, and also the importance of having a ritualized, highly structured venue for boys and girls to meet and interact within an understandable set of rules and respectful limits. The current socio-sexual free-for-all isn't good for anyone.
On projecting roles: I had this happen to me a few months ago, and it was so disconcerting! I was trying to ask someone for-- information, resources. This person had access. I didn't. I inquired whether it would be possible for me to either access the resources directly, or get access to them through some authorized person. I never did get an answer, because the person kept responding to the questions she *thought* I was asking, and not the questions I was actually asking. As though she had decided ahead of time who I was (I barely know her!), what I wanted, and how she would respond to it, had guessed wrong, but wasn't able to get off script. I'm still puzzling over the appropriate response to this. Is there one?
As for Christianity and persecution fantasies... sigh. 100% on the human sacrifice thing. I've been an archaeology buff since age 8 and that seems to be pretty universal among our ancestors. I'm happy to belong to a religion that doesn't do that! But also grew up protestant, and the delusions-of-persecution and end-times-campfire-stories were... embarrassing. It's not like Christians don't have real persecution to use as a reference point-- from Diocletian all the way through to Nigeria right now this minute, it's a thing. But it ain't happening right now in the US, and it's really disrespectful to the many, many Christian martyrs to cast ourselves in that role, when we are still living comfortably and in zero danger of being macheted to death or having our teenage daughters kidnapped, because of our religion. Seriously, people.
Somebody needs to hold one of these up every time some dingus in America claims we're being persecuted-- particularly for fundraising purposes. No, we're just lazy and letting our churches be taken over by contemporary politics, and failing to focus on the eternal. Nobody's doing that to us. We do it to ourselves.
Our forbears... from what I've read, the early evangelism was wildly successful in part because our guys were so darn good at casting out demons, and demonic infestations were apparently a very common problem! I see no reason to doubt this, and to your point: the story of Sts Cyprian and Justina is pretty archetypal here. But also, Christianity offered dignity and respect to women, slaves, and children. "Christians don't leave their unwanted babies on hillsides to die" is a thing that turns up in the contemporary pagan literature of the early centuries. This was, oddly enough, popular with women. Last I checked, this is no longer the case-- abortion stats inside and outside the church are not noticeably different. But I expect the idea will come into its own again, in time.
Slaves and others at the bottom of ancient society of course resonated with things like "the first shall be last and the last shall be first" -- the idea that humility, whether you chose it or had it forced on you-- was a noble calling in the eyes of God, and had worth. The highest worth, even.
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2023-09-21 08:55 pm (UTC)Dancing, though... I suffer the classic autistic terminal clumsiness. I've tried. It just ain't happening. My poor mother sent me to three years of ballet classes hoping I'd develop a little coordination and stop running into doorframes. No luck. I appreciate social dance in theory, and I think there should be a lot more of it-- I'd be totally thrilled to see a revival of barn dances, and things like the Virginia Reel, because I have an inkling of the social-cohesion importance, and also the importance of having a ritualized, highly structured venue for boys and girls to meet and interact within an understandable set of rules and respectful limits. The current socio-sexual free-for-all isn't good for anyone.
On projecting roles: I had this happen to me a few months ago, and it was so disconcerting! I was trying to ask someone for-- information, resources. This person had access. I didn't. I inquired whether it would be possible for me to either access the resources directly, or get access to them through some authorized person. I never did get an answer, because the person kept responding to the questions she *thought* I was asking, and not the questions I was actually asking. As though she had decided ahead of time who I was (I barely know her!), what I wanted, and how she would respond to it, had guessed wrong, but wasn't able to get off script. I'm still puzzling over the appropriate response to this. Is there one?
As for Christianity and persecution fantasies... sigh. 100% on the human sacrifice thing. I've been an archaeology buff since age 8 and that seems to be pretty universal among our ancestors. I'm happy to belong to a religion that doesn't do that! But also grew up protestant, and the delusions-of-persecution and end-times-campfire-stories were... embarrassing. It's not like Christians don't have real persecution to use as a reference point-- from Diocletian all the way through to Nigeria right now this minute, it's a thing. But it ain't happening right now in the US, and it's really disrespectful to the many, many Christian martyrs to cast ourselves in that role, when we are still living comfortably and in zero danger of being macheted to death or having our teenage daughters kidnapped, because of our religion. Seriously, people.
There are already some poignant and startling icons for the 21 Coptic martyrs in Libya in 2015:
https://catholic-link.org/wp-content/uploads/2015/10/martires-sirios.jpg
https://www.ukcopticicons.com/product-page/21-martyrs-of-libya
Those were real men.
Somebody needs to hold one of these up every time some dingus in America claims we're being persecuted-- particularly for fundraising purposes. No, we're just lazy and letting our churches be taken over by contemporary politics, and failing to focus on the eternal. Nobody's doing that to us. We do it to ourselves.
Our forbears... from what I've read, the early evangelism was wildly successful in part because our guys were so darn good at casting out demons, and demonic infestations were apparently a very common problem! I see no reason to doubt this, and to your point: the story of Sts Cyprian and Justina is pretty archetypal here. But also, Christianity offered dignity and respect to women, slaves, and children. "Christians don't leave their unwanted babies on hillsides to die" is a thing that turns up in the contemporary pagan literature of the early centuries. This was, oddly enough, popular with women. Last I checked, this is no longer the case-- abortion stats inside and outside the church are not noticeably different. But I expect the idea will come into its own again, in time.
Slaves and others at the bottom of ancient society of course resonated with things like "the first shall be last and the last shall be first" -- the idea that humility, whether you chose it or had it forced on you-- was a noble calling in the eyes of God, and had worth. The highest worth, even.