Alas, he does not re-shelve the books, or if he does they go in sideways and get damaged. Often as not they remain on the floor, and then brothers step on them, and next thing I know, I am finding mangled, coverless books strewn about the floor. We have simply thrown away at least a dozen at this point :( Spent about an hour recently painstakingly using archival document tape to repair an irreplaceable 1910-ish atlas with about five pages carelessly ripped out. It is a prime target because it is huge and makes great ramps... and it belongs to my middle child who loves it, so for 4yo it's easy retaliation for perceived wrongs. I've had to move it to my bedroom shelf. (demoralized sobbing)
I did honestly try, particularly when they were very young, to never repel offers and attempts at help. Praise, find little jobs, don't nitpick, etc. and was careful to stock the kitchen with thrift-store dishes so we did not have to lose our minds when things got broken, and we could get them gradually trained to be actually helpful. It has not worked. We are still having to slog through it the hard way with unwilling children. And that sucks.
I think a lot of the problem is simply that *I* hate housework, and I can't hide that from them, and they pick up the attitude. I was raised in a chaotic house where nobody cleaned except as an emergency measure (and then it was torture because mountains of stuff to move and the floors practically had to be sanded to get them clean). I could manage it, barely, when I was young and lived alone, by simply living like a monk-- I had hardly any stuff, and on more than one occasion was able to pick up and move 800 miles away with just a suitcase. That's how much stuff I can handle responsibly without cracking up. But now... I've got four other people to look after, and I can't force them to live like monks. Figuring this out is *hard*. Probably one of the hardest things I've ever had to do.
It's a work in progress. Very slow progress. Every little bit helps.
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I did honestly try, particularly when they were very young, to never repel offers and attempts at help. Praise, find little jobs, don't nitpick, etc. and was careful to stock the kitchen with thrift-store dishes so we did not have to lose our minds when things got broken, and we could get them gradually trained to be actually helpful. It has not worked. We are still having to slog through it the hard way with unwilling children. And that sucks.
I think a lot of the problem is simply that *I* hate housework, and I can't hide that from them, and they pick up the attitude. I was raised in a chaotic house where nobody cleaned except as an emergency measure (and then it was torture because mountains of stuff to move and the floors practically had to be sanded to get them clean). I could manage it, barely, when I was young and lived alone, by simply living like a monk-- I had hardly any stuff, and on more than one occasion was able to pick up and move 800 miles away with just a suitcase. That's how much stuff I can handle responsibly without cracking up. But now... I've got four other people to look after, and I can't force them to live like monks. Figuring this out is *hard*. Probably one of the hardest things I've ever had to do.
It's a work in progress. Very slow progress. Every little bit helps.